Do you ever really listen to yourself? I mean, really listen to yourself.

I recently spoke with a friend who is a professional basketball player overseas, and what he said to me really hit home right in my soul.

He told me about a book that a coach asked him to read that taught him one critical lesson.

How you feel matters.

Simple, right? I wondered how someone in his mid-twenties applied that information and so, I asked him about just that. The depth of his response impressed me even more.

He learned to respect how he feels, but he continues to foster a self-awareness practice through activities like meditation and journaling. He pointed out that this is a key to his success because he’s been able to not only stay true to his vision for his career in tough moments, but he’s also able to use the information to help him slow down and duplicate success.

“When I pay attention, I can learn how to replicate my success. So, I can go back to my journal and look at different experiences,” he said to me.

Keep in mind, this is a person whose career is exploding and in its prime so I think this is another good time to point out that the balance between mental toughness and mental wellness is an advantageous skillset.

Why listen to your emotions?

• Emotions are a compass. They will tell you everything you need to know, as long as you don’t shove them away.
• Everyone has buttons that can be pushed. To understand what pushes your buttons, you have to pay attention to your emotional reaction. Then, once you have this information you can decide if you want to learn to prepare yourself for those moments, or how to heal from those triggers, or just avoid future situations that would push those buttons.
• Learning to listen to your emotions is a window to your inner voice, or your intuition or gut as some might call it. This practice can help you clear the way for your purpose.
• Taking the time to listen to this inner voice will help you slow down, which will help you stay steady, focused, and make better decisions.

How can you listen to your emotions?

Emotional Intelligence (or E.I.) is something that truly is an ongoing process. Life is constantly evolving, and so are you. So, to listen to your emotions, you have to practice doing that regularly throughout your entire life.

Whether you journal, meditate, or however you choose to self-reflect, schedule it into your day. Start with once a week if you have to, but take a page from my friend’s book and ask yourself questions like:

• How did I feel today?
• What motivated or inspired me?
• What or who pushed my buttons?
• What was my schedule like?
• How did I sleep the night before?
• What did I eat and drink?
• What can I learn from this?

Honest introspection will help you resolve many of the questions that you probably ask about yourself and about life.

Keys to the game:

• No one can listen to your emotions for you (i.e., it’s not something you can outsource).
• Learn to hear yourself without judging yourself. There are no right or wrong emotions. Let them be so you can honor yourself, heal, and be happy.

Need someone to hold a safe emotional reflection space for you? Join a one-on-one VIP coaching program with me so I can help you work through tough emotions, resolve inner conflict, and transform worries and fears.