5 Ways to Stop Comparing Yourself as an Athlete

Photo by Tony Schnagl

Comparison is a natural part of the athletic journey. Every athlete is competitive and therefore compares their performance against results. You know that in order to make a team, win championships, and get to the next level you have to be the best you can be, and better than your competitors. But constantly measuring yourself against others can get tricky. It can push you forward, pull you down, or a combination of the two when it gets into your head.

You train with teammates, compete against rivals, and follow others’ success on social media. You watch how others train, see their brand deals, and check out their ratings. Even subtle cues like how they carry themselves under pressure, how they react to others, and how they interact with media can be a place for comparison. Comparison can hurt your performance and mental health, but it can be used as a tool for growth.

How Can I Be Competitive Without Comparing Myself to Others?

Athletes often believe that to succeed, they need to measure up against everyone around them. To succeed, you have to be better. In today’s world, that can go beyond the field and into areas like marketing and branding where athletes at collegiate and high school levels seek to secure NIL deals. It’s easy to get lost in who is doing what.

In reality, the key to sustained success is competing against yourself. You can be intensely competitive without falling into the comparison trap by focusing on your own progress and development. Prioritizing personal growth over external comparison creates a more sustainable path to success.

Here’s how to do it:

Focus on Your Personal Best: Instead of looking at others’ achievements, track your own progress. Keep your attention on improving your performance, and the competition will take care of itself.
Set Process-Oriented Goals: Shift from focusing solely on winning or beating someone to focusing on improving your technique, mindset, or physical conditioning. This allows you to stay grounded in your journey.
Compete Against Yourself: Keep a log of your personal stats, challenges, and improvements. Your toughest competitor should always be your last performance.

When is Comparison Destructive?

I once worked with a basketball player who had some mindset blocks for a few reasons. One of them occurred during the pre-game warm-ups when he would watch the opposing team. He quickly got distracted by what they were doing, and it started him down a mental spiral comparing himself against what they were doing. We worked together to develop a new pre-game plan for him which included some affirmations, perspective shifts, and even physical movement to bring it all together.

Comparison can easily become destructive. When you focus too much on what others are doing, you start to lose sight of your own training, progress, and accomplishments. This can lead to feelings of inadequacy, stress, and self-doubt. It can also become a distraction that hinders your growth because you’ve allowed what others are doing to take up space in your mindset. You wind up spending energy focusing on someone else’s achievements rather than clearing as much mental space as possible to work on your own.

Here are some reasons why comparison can become toxic:

It Damages Confidence: When you’re constantly comparing yourself to others, especially to those who may appear more advanced, it’s easy to feel like you’re not measuring up, even when you’ve personally made significant progress. Your progress can feel inadequate blocking you from soaking up the motivation to continue your improvements.
It Creates Pressure: Trying to “keep up” with others can put unnecessary pressure on you to perform. This pressure often leads to burnout rather than growth when you overcompensate. For example, if you feel like you can’t rest because you’ll fall behind, you risk not listening to your body, which often results in injury or illness.
It Distracts You from Your Goals: Focusing too much on others’ achievements can make you lose track of your own priorities. You start playing someone else’s game, which pulls you away from what matters most to you. You define the goals that are meaningful to you, not the other way around.
It Undermines Your Self-Worth: Your self-worth is not dependent on other people. That’s why it’s called “self-worth.” Yet, many people often view their value based on what other people have achieved.

The Power of Healthy Comparison

While many athletes often think of comparison as negative, it can occasionally be useful when approached from the right mindset. When used mindfully, comparison doesn’t have to be a negative experience. Healthy comparison can motivate you, highlight areas for improvement, and serve as a learning tool.

Here’s how comparison can benefit your athletic journey:

Motivation: Seeing other athletes succeed can be a reminder of what’s possible with consistent effort and dedication. It’s very common for athletes with natural talent to not train as hard as someone who is considered an underdog. I’m reminded of the story of Michael Jordan being cut from his high school team and how that drove him to work during the summer when other players weren’t training. We know how that story ends.
Insight into Your Weaknesses: Watching others can show you where you need to improve. Instead of feeling threatened, use this as an opportunity to refine your skills. Continue to grow your skillset. Ask for help from mentors who can help pinpoint areas you can improve. This is the difference in why individuals have incredible success. They are always open and they never stop learning.
Benchmarking for Growth: Healthy comparison can help you create benchmarks for your own development. Use others’ success as inspiration rather than competition, and focus on applying the lessons you learn to your own path. Create your goals.

5 Ways to Stop Comparing Yourself to Other Athletes

If you find that comparison is holding you back, here are five effective strategies to help you refocus on your own journey.

1. Shift Your Focus to Growth Over Results

Instead of comparing yourself to others’ successes, focus on your own growth and improvement.

Exercise: Keep a Daily Wins Journal where you write down three small achievements each day. This could be anything from completing a difficult workout to mastering a new technique. Celebrate your progress, no matter how small. Remain focused on incremental improvements, because they add up. Think of it this way: One is more than zero and why many successful people focus on getting 1% better. It’s the seemingly small improvements that add up to outcomes and goals over time.

2. Manage Social Media Like a Business

Social media often presents a highlight reel of others’ lives, which can skew your perception of your own progress. It can look like someone has achieved more, but you never see the full story on social media. It’s tempting to get lost in what other people are doing, and what other people are saying.

Tool: Treat social media like a business. Think more rationally and less emotionally by sticking to the facts, rather than the perception or illusion. Do your best to align only with those who share your values and help you grow. Set specific limits on your social media usage. For example, consider reducing your time on social platforms, especially before or after training sessions or games, to stay more connected to your own journey. Unfollow accounts that stress you out. Ignore negative comments. Protect your circle and your peace.

3. Practice Getting into a Growth Mindset

As athletes and high-achievers, we want to be the best. We also often feel like whatever we do, we can always do more. It’s easy to get caught up in what others have achieved and what their timeline looks like compared to ours. Gratitude and acceptance help us to get out of the rut of beating ourselves up and into a growth mindset where anything is possible. We spend less time being down on ourselves and in a negative rut, and more time letting things go so we can move forward and take action towards progress.

Exercise: Have you ever started your day feeling like you’re already behind and worried that you won’t be able to do enough? Maybe it feels like you’ll never catch up. Start your day with the intention of getting your mindset into growth mode with these three steps.

List five things you are grateful for.
Accept that you are doing your best. Give yourself permission to push past limits with courage, but to also accept that you can only accomplish so much on any given day. Remember, a small improvement is still an improvement.
Set an intention for your day and visualize yourself applying it throughout the day.

4. Reframe Comparison as Learning

Rather than seeing others as competition, view them as teachers who can help you improve. This changes your perspective from envy and ego to an open mind where you can build on what they are doing.

Tool: When you feel the urge to compare, write down what you’re focused on and ask, “What can I learn from this?” Use the insights to improve your performance without internalizing negative self-talk. Create your own empowered skillset that allows you to build on what you admire about others.

5. Celebrate Others’ Success Without Judgment

When you support or acknowledge someone else, you’re eliminating fear and insecurity within yourself. You take back your personal power over your inner game because you’re not threatened. Instead, when you celebrate someone else’s success, you lower your stress and make room for your own journey to evolve. You’re not stuck focused on what someone else is doing and or what they have achieved, which allows you to evolve as a leader in your story and in your sport.

Exercise: Each week, compliment a teammate or peer on something they’ve achieved. Shifting to a mindset of appreciation not only builds a stronger team culture but also eases the pressure of comparison. You emerge as a confident leader, which helps you perform better in and of itself. You may also attract others to want to help you build on your game as well.

Comparison can either be a destructive force or a tool for growth, depending on how you approach it. By focusing on your own journey, using comparison as a learning tool, and keeping your attention on your personal goals, you can stay competitive without letting comparison steal your joy. Remember, your worth isn’t defined by how you measure up to others—it’s defined by the effort, dedication, and mindset you bring to your sport.

Athlete Mental Health