Is your schedule giving you anxiety?

I’ve noticed that for people who suffer from anxiety, their schedule can be a factor in those overwhelming feelings. In my own life, if I’m too busy and don’t take any time to myself to be alone and quiet my mind, my mind stays on overdrive and I’m burnt out, exhausted, cranky, and easily become anxious or worried. If on the other hand, things are too quiet for too long (and by “too long” I mean emotionally, not time-wise), I get anxious and freak out because now I have nervous energy. 

As a toddler, I once told my mom that I couldn’t sleep because I had “nervous eyes.” Still true.

So, how can you, or I, find a realistic balance of time, energy, and emotion?

I began to explore this several months ago when, on the brink of a meltdown, I decided that I needed to examine my schedule and how I spend my time. Nothing is worth sacrificing my peace of mind, but I also feel strongly that if I’m not doing something and not killing myself in the process, I’m not doing enough and I’m going to fail.

It’s a habit I formed somewhere in my twenties because I felt that if I was going to be successful, I had to work much harder than anyone else and therefore suffering meant success. As I know now, I took myself, and my career, much too seriously.

It’s been a habit that’s hard to break but I do recognize it and I’m working on it.

How do you create a balanced schedule to combat anxiety?

You’ve likely heard the phrase, “work-life balance.” Lately, I’ve read several articles by people who say that’s nothing more than a myth. Well, to each his or her own. If you’re an anxious person, time balance is important, and emotional balance is extremely important. It doesn’t have to be a 50-50 balance at all times and in everything you do. Sometimes, your work needs more attention, sometimes it’s your family, and sometimes it’s yourself. Everyone’s needs are different and so everyone’s schedule will look different.

Balance isn’t necessarily an issue of time and tasks, but of emotions.

For me, I like to create my weekday schedule to resemble a sandwich. I’ll explain what that means in a moment. I’m not always great at maintaining that schedule, but it’s a formula that helps. I’ll preface this by saying that I’m a business owner and married, but childless so please don’t roll your eyes or judge me if what I’m about to explain seems unrealistic to you. The point is to give you an example of how to create a schedule that works for you.

My philosophy of a sandwich schedule is one that includes doing something for yourself first thing in the morning (one piece of bread), then doing all your other stuff (the sandwich filling), and then wrapping up the day by doing something else for yourself (the other piece of bread). Here’s how I apply that.

• For the first piece of bread, I spend just a few minutes (literally like two to three minutes) when I first wake up practicing mindful movement (my favorite type of meditation). Two days a week, I have also committed to going into the office a little bit later so that I can spend time writing (roughly 30 minutes or so). This is the best time to write because once my mind turns to my to-do lists and serving others’ needs, my mental energy is usually exhausted by the end of the day.
• The bulk of my day is spent adulting (i.e., working, going to meetings, running errands, taking care of household items, etc.).
• This brings me to the second piece of my sandwich bread, which is a workout. I may not be on a team or compete, but I consider myself an athlete because I have physical energy that I like to put into weight training, running, boxing, and even cardio line dancing. That time is when I disconnect from my day and reconnect with myself, and so it’s essential to my mind, my physical body, and getting rid of that nervous energy. I’m also very competitive and so physical achievements help keep me motivated. Some evenings I’ll even throw in another five to ten minutes to meditate or I’ll read something inspiring.

Your schedule will look different than mine because everyone’s schedule is different. I am willing to bet you can pick out an hour or two one day a week (e.g., wake up a little earlier one day a week perhaps) for self-development and quiet time.

The only person who can prioritize that is you. You deserve it and you need it so ask for it and allow yourself to have it. Also, don’t feel like you have to do anything grinding with that time, which brings me to my next point.

How do you spend your personal time?

If you’re stressed or burnt out, you should probably carve out two to three hours to do nothing so you can relax and unwind. That’s so very valuable to peace of mind and combatting anxiety.

I think the idea of always having to be “doing” something so that you don’t fall behind is an anxiety-driven behavior.

I also believe that mental health is personal so it’s important to listen to your intuition and your body. It’ll tell you what you need to do. That’s how I know it’s time to do nothing and be alone or it’s time to go for a run before my energy gets the best of me.

Personally, I have a sweet spot between lethargy and over activeness that I work to maintain but I don’t have a formula to predict when it’s going to swing one way or the other. I just listen to myself. When I get in an uncomfortable zone, I know it’s time to make an adjustment even if the anxiety I’m feeling wants to fight me on that.

Here’s the thing: You’re in control of your schedule. If you’re doing too much and don’t have any free time, take a look at what purpose each of those activities serves.

Sometimes we do too much to keep ourselves distracted from the real work we need to be doing (e.g., self-development or making a change).

We all have responsibilities and no one’s schedule will ever be perfect, but the goal is to achieve a sense of inner balance. That goes a long way in keeping anxiety away or at least minimal. When you know yourself—which is an ongoing journey of discovery that happens when you take the time to do so—you give yourself optimum opportunity to achieve a peaceful balance of mind, body, and soul.

We grow into ourselves when we quiet our minds and connect with who we are instead of all the stuff that’s buzzing around us.

If you’re feeling a lot of anxiety for days on end, I encourage you to look at your schedule and how you’re spending your time, and more importantly, how that makes you feel. It probably won’t solve everything, but it’s a start.

Want to chat about your schedule? Contact me here and let’s chat.